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  • Marti Stelling

Wouldn’t it be nice if making friends was as easy as it was in primary school?

You normally became friends with someone because they lived near you, or your parents were friends with their parents. You had a guaranteed person to play with and sit next to at lunch every day. You’d go round to each other’s houses for tea, go on days out together, and attend every single birthday party.


Even during secondary school, you were forced to spend all day with other people your age, meaning immediate friendships (and sometimes mortal enemies!) These were the people who you shared all the ups and downs of growing up with, from first kisses to first heartbreaks.


Unfortunately, making friends in your 20s isn’t quite as simple. It takes a conscious effort. Even at uni, it’s easy to enter your own bubble and not put in the effort you need to make friends. It's unlikely somebody is going to come up to you and ask to be bezzie mates like they did at primary school. It takes effort to put yourself out there and often friends are found in the most unexpected places (grubby club toilets anyone?)


Even keeping up with friends from home is difficult. Your 20s are a busy time for everybody, whether you’re studying, working, or caring for your family. It’s natural to drift apart from some friends, and if you’re lucky, you may find yourself growing closer to others. Sure, you may go weeks without speaking and schedule coffee dates five months in advance, but that’s what makes your time spent together even more special.


It’s completely normal to feel lonely from time to time, especially in your 20s when everyone is at different points in their lives. Your friendships may look different to how they did when you were in primary school, but they are just as important.


So, whether you’re reconnecting with friends from the past, joining coursemates for a drink after uni, or meeting new people at a club or society, here’s to great friendships- whatever shape they take!


Edited by Larissa Hurt

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