REVIEW: Everything I Know About Love - Dolly Alderton

Although not a new book, Dolly Alderton's Everything I Know About Love (2018) is a beautiful yet hilarious insight into what some might call a Bridget Jones life – and is relatable for so many of us as young adults.

Alderton’s writing style is uniquely entertaining with her diary-like witticism and chaotic lists to emphasise the emotional turmoil and mixed messages young girls receive from society, in terms of where you're supposed to be and what you're supposed to be doing.

'When friends have boyfriends, they become boring, and if you don't have one, chances are you're going to get jealous. Boys only like it if you are mean to them, and if you are nice, you're uncool and most likely still a virgin. The mark of true love is when two boys fight over you and blood is drawn, not too much for hospital, but enough to know you're pretty and wanted. Oh, and don’t forget to get married young enough to have kids, but not too young because you're wasting the prime of your life. But don't worry because you know when you get a boyfriend, all these thoughts will go away forever…'

The irony of this statement is all too familiar and cutting.

We have all been jealous and on the outside of love, then on the inside, then just to end up back on the outside again. But there is one constant that remains – people accept and expect this unachievable behaviour for women to follow, as a checklist of ‘how to be happy’.

Alderton's book starts this way, but she proceeds to talk about deeply personal experiences that bring to life a normal girl.

This girl demonstrates there is nothing more embarrassing than trying to kiss the tall boy in your class at 17 and pulling away right before you fall over. But then again, there is nothing more heartbreaking than when the boy you thought you loved leaves at 15, but 10 years later you bump into him in the street and he turned out to be gay.

The book is a true and rib-tickling insight into the mind of a girl, like you, me and your mum when she was your age – and probably even a reflection of how your dad was with girls. The best part is, her stories are genuine.

They say if you don't laugh, you cry, and I think this is the perfect representation of how I felt reading this triumph of growing up and not quite maturing the way you should have.

This non-fiction book lists the things Alderton's scared of, recipes for when you’re hungover and ‘can't be arsed to cook’, and most importantly, reassures the reader about the realities of university life.

As they say, hindsight is a wonderful thing, and this book may be the new anthem to getting yourself mentally through the tough and testing years of your life.

Everyone has dealt with the stereotyping, the tragic dates, the heartbreak. But everyone will also experience staying out until sunrise, making new memories, and losing your voice for three weeks because you can't stop singing to all the songs in your favourite club.

Reading this book might not change your mind on how cruel growing up can be, but it may make you realise that life is for squeezing.

Seriously though, stay away from boys!

Edited by Jemma Snowdon